Look Aunt Franny, I did it!

gnocchi

Definition: [NYOH-kee; NOH-kee] Italian for "dumplings," gnocchi can be made from potatoes, flour or farina. Eggs or cheese can be added to the dough, and finely chopped spinach is also a popular addition. Gnocchi are generally shaped into little balls, cooked in boiling water and served with butter and Parmesan or a savory sauce. The dough can also be chilled, sliced and either baked or fried. Gnocchi are usually served as a side dish and make excellent accompaniments for meat or poultry.

OK, so my sister and niece came to visit last week from Seattle. My sister has not seen our Sicilian grandmother since 1963, meaning she was only three when she saw her last. We decide to do a kamakazi trip up to New York to see our 95 year old Grandma. It was the BEST ROAD TRIP EVER!!! We drove 12 hours, got there too late to see Grandma, so we bunked up at a great hotel for the night. The next morning we call Grandma up, and start our usual chat. I hand the phone to my sister,pull up in Grandma's driveway, and ring her doorbell. She tells my sister, "Hold on honey, there's someone at my door." You should have seen her face! My grandmother never thought she'd have the opportunity to see my sister again. (that's a long story, too boring to tell) So we got to spend the day with her, and her daughter, my Aunt Franny, taught me how to roll a true gnocchi. Aunt Fran uses the roll it on the fork method. Grandma uses the thumb only method. It makes a more smooth, shell like gnocchi. Anyway, I will never forget standing next to my Auntie and learning to make a respectable gnocchi.
So anyone want to come to dinner, I am a gnocchi rollin-eestahhh!
And yes, that is my first one, captured for posterity.
We also brought back a 5 pound bucket of Grandma's meatballs that I wished would last forever...
P.S. Grandma also wears dangling earrings, blue jeans and uses Oil of Olay Night Firming Cream!

It ain't a roach...

just a lil' Palmetto bug. Or as we say here in the South...Palmettuh bug, or water bug. See, we don't have roaches in our immaculate homes.
Well, we are in the grips of a major drought, and with the plague comes the pestilence.These bugs are just in search of a little water. Too bad they tried coming into my home to find it.
Yes, they are big enough to put a saddle on, like anyone would do that. Thankfully, they do not 'infest' the home, but merely are passing through. This comes from a doctor at Duke, so it must be true. Too bad it decided to make a detour through Casa de Mah. And I might also add that I will not ever touch that quarter again.
So this little fella will go with the bat, in the chapter of my life called Varmints That Crossed My Threshold But Wished They Hadn't.
Norman Bates got nuthin' on me...

Where did all this junk come from?

OK, now I realize, these days you can't use the word 'junk' because it has so many interesting connotations. As in 'junk in the trunk' and 'that guy hit him in the junk'...
For all practical purposes here, junk is clutter.
We are getting our house ready to sell. This is huge for me, because I am a struggling paper-aholic. I am the collector of everyone's school work, on top of an out of control magazine habit. Then there's all the craft stuff from being in Primary for so long, Activity Day Girls leader and just being the mom of a small tribe.
So we are attacking one room at the time,trying to trash and Goodwill more than we box up to store. So far it is working well. Last night the hubby decided we would tackle our bedroom.
The bedroom is our oasis, or refuge. Everyone wants to hang out in our bedroom. So everything is in our bedroom. All the papers, magazines, crafts etc. Do you know that all the above are major dust collectors? Duh. There were enough dust bunnies to make a ward. Anyway,I am learning the difference between keep and toss. Not every item Sonny Boy has ever written needs to be saved for time and all eternity.
So room by room we are eating the elephant. After we de-clutter, it's on to painting. So why wouldn't someone want to buy my house with my pink bedroom walls???

It's great to be married to a Metro...

Next week is my dear hubby's birthday and what did we do for an early celebration? We went to the spa for an afternoon of facials,massages,mani's and pedi's. Yes, if he goes, I get to go too. On a sad note, when I asked for a brow wax, she asked if I wanted a lip wax too. I didn't know I needed it. But sadly, under the intense glare of the esthetician's light, there was indeed a bit of dark peach fuzz. So at the tender age of 49 and almost 1/2....I had my 'stache ripped off.
But otherwise it was a great day!
Life is pretty sweet being married to a Metro.

Blub Blog

I am almost 6 months from the big 5-0 and I have decided I need to stop looking like I've had eight kids. So I JOINED A GYM!!! I know, pick yourself up off the floor, but there's more, I HIRED A PERSONAL TRAINER!!! This means there is no excuses, I have hired my own personal nag. So far, aside from yesterday, I have gone every weekday for three weeks. Yesterday was a day off due to my, once again, breaking my !@#$ ankle. I'm in an airboot, and I can put weight on it, so I am good. The best part of this is, my trainer is the mother of seven and is working off a little chub herself. She is awesome. Anyway, I was thinking about diets (that starts next week) and I thought, "How the heck many diets have I been on in my life?" So here is a partial list...
The Scarsdale Diet

The Stillman Diet(Scarsdale and Stillman were neighbors in the land of Nocarbsforutopia)

then of course there is the Carb Addicts Diet

Sugar Busters

Weight Watchers x 5 or was it 6???

Diet Center

Adkins (gross)

South Beach (this was actually pretty good)

Nutrisystem (food is disgusting and rather 'clogging')

MediFast (lost a whole 8 pounds in two months, yippy)

The Lemonade Fast (burn baby burn)

The Egyptian diet (barf for weeks on end, then in nine months you turn into a Mummy)


Oh, and we can't forget my Dear Hubby's great purchase Seaweed Soap...wash the fat away...that was a real wise one. No late night TV for you honey.

So, what weird diets have y'all been on and did they work? LOL!!!

I Went to Utah and All I Got Was a Pouf!

I knew something was up on the flight from Phoenix to SLC. The flight attendant 'of a certain age' had a lined,gaunt,tanned yet impeccably made up face. Her almost waist length hair was a perfect chocolate brown.It was the tippy top that was a marvelous work and a wonder. A frothy, tangled mass of shellacked hair that defied gravity. I bet she added a good four inches to her height.
Now I will be the first to say I do a bit of backcombing on the top of my coconut, but this was like a monument. In some strange, sick way, I am drawn to the height and majesty of the Pouf. The urge to grab a comb and my giant can of Big Sexy hairspray is all consuming.
So come on ladies...admit it...do you do Poufs?

Farewell to my sweet son

I handed him over to the Lord for two years...and even though I've done this before, I can't believe the depth of my sorrow in leaving him. He will be an amazing
missionary, and I know that the Lord will mold him into an incredible young man. And I know I would cry more if he stayed, and chose not to go. I look forward to the day I am not crying at the mention of his name. While we sing the Primary songs with all the joy they deserve,I Hope They Call Me On A Mission, and the like...to actually watch them go through the door that says 'New Missionaries Enter Here'.sigh...

I could see the change in him after he dropped his luggage off when we first arrived at the MTC. The mantle was upon him and he wasn't looking back. I finally got the honor of pinning the name tag on MY SON. (those in the know, will get that statement) The little meeting they have is totally just to give you a couple more precious moments with your child, so I didn't mind, but I didn't pay much attention either. All I could think of was I wouldn't get to touch my son's face for two whole years. That I wouldn't hear him call me 'mommy' or hear his voice echoing from the den, as he joked around with his siblings..for two whole years. I wouldn't get to hug his teddy bear self whenever I pleased. As the movie ended, the tears began to flow. I am glad my son had given me about 5 tissues to muffle my sobs.I am grateful he took my hand during the closing prayer, it's like he gave me a gift. And as he turned to leave, I had to have just one more hug, and he let me have one. He didn't pull an 'Oh Mom let me go!' He even turned around for one last smile and wave. He didn't shed a tear, he was so full of joy. I am so blessed.

Idaho, please take good care of my boy.

Oh what do you do in SLC?

We are going for the first time, and I want to know what to see and what to avoid.
The best shopping, as in LDS shopping...
Best 'nice' dining experience
Best casual eating place
What are some of the 'can't miss' things?
We are renting a car so we will be driving around...

Finally!

It was every bit of two years, but it was worth it. My son has returned with honor, a new and improved version of the son we sent out. I can't say it was painless for me, but the man he has become could not have been produced by staying here. Every time he comes into the room, it is such a joy to see him. We had EVERYONE together for Sunday dinner, and I have to say, it was heaven...even though we ran short on the gnocchi, it was wonderful! We also took over sacrament meeting, with the 17 year old DD, 19 year old pre-missionary DS and the RM giving talks. Then the 11 year old DD sang Joseph Smith's First Prayer a cappella. It was the first time in forever that our entire family was at church together, even my SIL.
I am blessed...

1,000 Words....

We're off to see the Wizard...

Actually we are off to DC, the closest distribution center, for a 'g' run. DS should have to go through the same thing his brother did, namely have some granny educate him on the merits of corban vrs poly/cotton.

The up side is, my only sister, the Debmeister, will be up there doing some training, so I get to see her for a few hours. I haven't seen her in almost 2 years, so it will be fun. The DH will have to put up with our neurotic sibling bashing and listen for the umpteenth time, the grievances of our childhoods. DS will be hanging out with an EFY friend, so he is exempt from neurosis-paluzza. I suppose I will owe my DH big time, but I always do, so the national debt grows...

This will all keep me occupied until Elder K makes his triumphant return, in glory, tomorrow night. That means we will have driven over 500 miles, disinfected the house, and assumed an air of piousness...all in 24 hours.

Yeah right!

Why did I start?

Why did I start reading Harry Potter? Why did I start scrap booking my son's mission pictures? Why did I start purging my house a week before my son returns from his mission.What am I, nuts?

I must have 4 inches of scrap book, as in it's 4 inches deep, maybe 6. It's still not done. I want to show my son what a diligent ma I am, ha ha! That would be me, waiting until the last minute, to chronicle the best two years of his life.

The Harry Potter thing started at the beach..I read 1 through 4. Then vacation was over, and I spent many a sleepless night reading number 5. Why did I need to lose sleep reading about a moody teenager, when I live with about 3 right now? Well, they don't have magical powers and the only person who's name is not uttered is Elder K's ex-girlfriend. Ha, I spelled it girl"fiend"...Freudian slip. Ma bad. Anyway, I am now on #6 and trying to be moderate with it, as in reading before, not after midnight. Well, I started two days ago, and have only blown it once, so I think I have got this moderation thing licked.

The purge. That is what my DH likes to do right before we have any change in our lives. Like Elder K coming home. Who cares that he has probably lived like a pig for the last two years, let's gut every room in the house, at the same time. So when your kids purge their rooms, guess where the purged items end up? Yes, in the hallway. So why can't I do this one room at a time? Because I am a wienie and knowing my loathing of de-cluttering, bow down to the Man, and begin filling endless bags with flotsam and jetsam. I have always wanted to use that term, but it wasn't as satisfying as I thought it'd be. Probably because I'm not finished. The youngest sons' room, the armpit of the house, and the dining room, are the last stand. I do not even think I will attempt the office, which is the convenient catchall for all the junk I don't want to deal with. So it's only two rooms, the office will stay locked. I have the key. Now onto the backyard to plant a few last minute flowers in preparation for...

the farewell luau we are throwing for the next Elder K, who leaves in a couple of weeks. I can only hope the weather will come down out of the 100's with accompanying high humidity. Who wouldn't want to come and eat Hawaiian pulled pork, and sweat?

Anyway, my first born son returns in a couple of days, and I couldn't be happier...unless I could read Harry Potter until about 3:00am....

Holy Bats in my Attic, Batman!

Ewww! As the good hubby was scrounging in the attic this morning, he hollers "There are about 20 bats up here!" Of course I HAVE to climb the ladder to see for myself. Dang my mono-vision contacts and their less than great distance vision. I saw a 'mass of darkness' in the eves, and said, "Are you sure that isn't a bunch of leaves?" But then it writhed. Yes, I believe that would be the correct word.Writhed. Anyway, we quickly got the heck out of there and closed the hatch.

Did I mention that about three weeks ago, my pre-mission son (who lives at home)calls his dad on his cell phone at 2:00 am with this dialog....

"Dad? Duuuuude...there is a bat in my bedroom!"

Apparently it came in when he got in that evening, nestling itself on the floor,in the doorway of his room. He said he walked in and out of there several times that evening, until he got ready to hit the hay.(I guess ESPN gets boring at 2:00am.) Then he turned on the light for the first time that night, only to see what he thought was a 'leaf' on the floor. (See we have a theme here) So he pokes at it with his handy dandy Boy Scout walking staff, and it hissed at him. Thank goodness we had him clean his room the day before, or it would have taken up residence in the endless pile of polo shirts, breeding and no doubt, making his room a true belfry. So the trusty Dad went downstairs to, what we now fondly call "the Batcave" and disposed of the little beastie.

But it looks like his momma sent a posse out to look for him....

BTW, that is not a picture of my hubby capturing the minion of darkness. He actually nabbed it in a Food Lion bag and...well, it's face could show up on a milk carton in a neighborhood near you.

Coming To The Dark Side

No not to Harry Potter, or Harry Pooter as we say in this household. I have gotten over ten pages done in my son, the most revered Elder Keith's scrapbook. There are no witty sayings or cute little cut out sticker thingies either. It was hard enough just figuring out who was in the picture and where the pictures were taken. He didn't put a date on any of them. So if the information is inaccurate, he can tell me, and as long as flames don't come flying out of my mouth due to indignation, we should all be peachy.

Did I mention he is coming home in 20 days? Hey, at least I kept all the pictures together in a gallon sized freezer bag. If anyone tells me "Those aren't acid free!" they might want to duck. Here comes the fire baby!

Now if I could learn from my procrastination with the next Elder Keith...aka the Spud Stud.(He's going to Idaho, get it...)

Anyway, I am rather pleased with myself because I have seen a HP movie and made major headway on a scrapbook.

Aren't a the little mainstreamer...



The above handsome Elder will be available August 16th. Applicants must be willing to live in NC and know how to 'go with the flow'. They must also submit to the Keith family's 'gauntlet of fire' aka, spend an evening with Isaac and live to tell the tale.

He does look kind of shiny, I don't remember his chin being so round...

My First Time

We all remember our first time. It is usually not so great, so y'all will have to be kind and understanding if I am clumsy, awkward and it ends too soon.

This past week I have been involved in an outdoor pageant. No not the beauty kind! It was what one would call a religious, historical pageant. Here is my first time in posting a website link...http://raleighpageant.org/ ...of course I didn't get it to underline, but remember this is my first time...

Anyway, I played the part of Emma Smith. This is because my hubby always plays Joseph and I am a jealous thang that doesn't like the idea of someone else grieving over my man's pseudo-dead remains. I was perfect for the part. Emma was tall, dark and slender. I am short, blonde and chubby. I did get to wear an awesome dark wig like the one pictured...that I couldn't figure out how to post below this paragraph! (I'm getting a little testy now...)

It's a fab look and the curls really bounce around when you walk. I think I would wear it everyday, but in the 100+ degree heat and high humidity that we were performing in, it kind of took the fun out of it.

I also played a doomed Nephite that gets speared after trying to save my son from the enemy. That's OK, Mormon got hacked to death too.

It was a long week, but despite the fact that I almost died of heat exhaustion, I would do it again next year.

Not too sure about the wig and crinoline though...